Mud Bath
by CaliGirlMon
Summary: What happens when auto correct, completely fails you! An utter-misunderstanding is what you get!


**Sample entry for the - Twific- Text Message LOL Contest**

* * *

_December 2012_

Bella hated shopping, especially at Christmas, if she could get away with giving everyone gift cards she would. But, god forbid she do that—Renee would disown her, as it was her friends and family already call her Scrooge. She just didn't see the point in spending all her money on gifts people more than likely would never use.

Bella's mother-Renee loved Christmas, she would bust out her decorations the day after Thanksgiving; buy a tree; put up cinnamon scented pine cones all around the house as Christmas carols floated through the air. Charlie could be found on the roof stringing up the lights, the Swan residence was always the brightest home on the block.

Needless to say Bella got dragged on her mother's traditional Black Friday Shopping excursion every year. She tried getting out of it this year—claiming she had plans with Edward. Bella and Edward had been a couple since high school, love at first sight you could say. The Cullens' had moved into the home next door to the Swans the summer of 2006.

The second Bella and Edward locked eyes, they were instantly drawn to each other, became best friends and have been inseparable ever since. Towards the middle of their sophomore year they started dating, and have been going strong since. They both had plans for college, Edward wanted to become a surgeon just like his father and Bella wanted to become an english teacher. Edward went to the University of New York while Bella went to the University of San Diego. They survived a long distance relationship—thanks to many late night 'facetime' and 'Skype' chats and texts.

"Ugh...I hate shopping, why do we have to do this again?" Bella scowls at Edward. "You know this is all your fault right...if you would have just gone along with me about having plans, we could have avoided all this crazy ass shit."

"Baby, you know your mom enjoys doing this every year, it's her thing," Edward shrugs. "We come home twice a year, I think you can handle a little shopping with your mom."

"This..." Bella motions at the sea of people in the mall. "Is not shopping, fucking craziness, is what it is."

"Stop being a Scrooge." Edward pinches her ass. "Besides I wanted to come today, I saw something on sale I wanna get you." Wiggling his eyebrows suggestively at Bella.

"Wha—" just as she was about to argue with Edward her phone chimes alerting her to an incoming text alert.

Removing her phone from her back pocket, she opens the text.

"Who is it?" Edward asks.

"My mom," Bella answers.

_I'm almost done with my shopping but still need something for Esme ~Mom_

_Do you think she'd like a musky pussy? ~Mom_

_WHAT!~Bee_

_No!~Bee_

_A musky perfume! I meant a musky perfume! Oh dear lord, that's why I hate this new phone it assumes what I want to say! ~Mom_

_Please don't show Edward, he will think I'm crazy!"~Mom_

_I'm sorry, I can't type right now. I'm dying of laughter! ~Bee_

Stopping dead in her tracks Bella doubles over in hysterics.

"What the hell." She gasps, clutching her stomach "Look what my mom just text me!" Shoving her phone Edward's face. "God this is hilarious." She wipes at her eyes. "My dad just bought her an iPhone so we can facetime, guess she figured out autocorrect sucks."

"Holy shit." Edward releases a loud guffaw "That's some funny shit, right there."

"Yeah, that made this whole day worth it." Bella continues to giggle uncontrollably "So, would your mom like a musky pussy?" She looks at Edward, they both have tears in their eyes from laughing.

"God I'm glad I've never had that happen to me." Edward shakes his head. "But I can tell you're the one who taught your mom to text...I'm too good to ever make a mistake like that." He says winking over at Bella.

"Yeah, whatever." Bella rolls her eyes. "You'll have your day, you mark my words — and I so hope it's with me so I can rub it in your face." Bella pushes Edward's shoulder playfully.

.

.  
Christmas came and went, Edward and Bella were back at school, back to their routines. Counting down the days to spring break, Edward was coming down to spend two weeks with Bella. His parents have a timeshare at a resort in Mission Bay, which they reserved for the couple this year.

Bella was so excited when Edward shared the news with her that she actually cried.

"Baby...why are you cryin'," Edward asked her while on video chat.

"I'm just so excited, two whole weeks, Edward, just you and me. I can't believe it. I have so much I want to show you." Bella answers.

"I'm excited too, love. I can't wait to wake up next to you and fall asleep hugging you every day for a few weeks. I've missed squeezing that ass." his smirks.

"Hahaha, very funny, Casanova." she rolls her eyes. Watching her blush slowly creep up her neck, Edward knows deep down inside Bella loves it when he talks dirty to her.

"So...have you tried on the Christmas present I got for you?"

"No, and I can't believe you convinced my mom to buy lingerie from Victoria's Secret for you!" Bella shrieks. "God I was completely mortified when I opened it...in front of my dad, Edward! Why would you let me open that in front of my dad?" Bella whine's.

"Baby, you're twenty-one year old college student, I think Charlie knows we're having sex. I mean how could you possible deny this..." Edward gestures to his body.

"OH what the fuck ever—Edward Cullen you're so full of yourself!" Bella exclaimed.

Throwing his head back in laughter—Edward loved teasing Bella, he loved getting a rise out of her. She was so beautiful, but looked the most beautiful when she blushed. He loved seeing the fantastic reddish-pink color creep up her chest, he just wanted to follow its path with his tongue. Thinking about how warm her blush made her skin, nuzzling his nose right in the middle of her breasts licking her cleavage, damn...it made his cock stand at attention.

"Why don't you go put on what I bought you love, show me how you look in it." Edward strokes his hardening member.

Bella takes in a sharp breath, is he really asking her to do this, to have skype sex. Looking into his hooded eyes, she knew damn well what he was asking her, it's not the first time they've done this, yet it still made Bella a little sheepish.

"Edward..." Bella mumbles breathlessly. "Are you stroking yourself?" she moans. "I wanna see you babe, let me see you."

"Fuck..." Edward chokes out, a loud moan escaping his lips. "You wanna see it baby, go put on what I asked Isabella." Edward's eyes become dark, his voice taking on a commanding tone.

Gripping the edges of her desk, Bella loves when Edward takes control like this, feeling how wet she already is, she squirms in her seat.

"Isabella, I asked you to do something, am I going to have to punish you."

"N..no..." Bella mutters.

"Good girl, go on and get changed, once you're done lay on your bed, call me from your phone—we'll facetime."

"Okay, I'll see you in a bit," she answers him, feeling her heart rate pick up.

Just as she was about to exit her restroom, Bella hears her roommate enter their dorm room. She curses her lack of privacy and hides out in the restroom to send a quick text to Edward.

_Fuck! Tanya just got here :( ~Bee_

Disappointment surges through her veins, Bella was looking forward to phone sex with Edward. They hardly see each other and these little intimate moments have begun to mean the world to her.

_AH shit! what now? ~E_

_What do you mean, what now? *smh* nothing is gonna happen now! ~Bee_

_Like hell it isn't, I'm fucking hard as hell baby, send me a pic of you in your outfit ;) ~E_

"God he's unbelievable." Bella snorts. Standing up, she faces the mirror and snaps a picture of herself. She's wearing a lacy midnight blue push up bra, barely there matching lace panties, thigh high lace trim stockings held up with a garterbelt. Staring at herself in the mirror she doesn't recognize the girl staring back at her.

Attaching the picture of herself to her text to Edward she sends it off.

_Hope you like it :) ~Bee_

Instantly she gets a reply.

_FUCK! Baby, you look spectacular, shit I wish I was there with you. I fucking love it! ~E_

Feeling herself blush at his compliments, she's about to respond when she receives another text from Edward.

_This is how much I love it ;) ~E_

Attached to his text is a picture of Edwards erect cock, standing at full attention in all it's glory. Biting back a moan, as to not alert Tanya of what she's doing in the bathroom, Bella's mouth begins to water.

"Fuck..." she mumbles under her breath. Edwards cock is beautiful, the perfect shade of pink- turning a hint of purple at the head, he's every woman's dream in length and girth. His balls are soft and round, they're the exact fit to her palm-leaving enough playroom to massage them.

_You like whatcha see, baby ~E_

_Yes, very much ~Bee_

_mmm, send me a pic of your tits, I wanna see my beautiful pink nipples ~E_

Removing her bra, Bella hugs herself across her chest, just under her breasts, pushing them together. Lifting her other arm above her head, she snaps the picture and sends it off.

_Oh fuck baby, I fucking love your pig tits! ~E_

_What!? ~Bee_

_What the fuck, Edward! ~Bee_

_OMG! no baby, no...! I meant to say big, oh fuck ~E_

I'm so sorry, *facepalm* please believe me Bella, I love your tits! ~E

_Baby, please... say something, fuck, I'm gonna call you, okay? ~E_

Initially being caught off guard with Edwards mistake her feelings were crushed. But the second she realized what had happened, she fell to the floor is hysterics. She could not believe that he had autocorrect failed at that moment, what were the odds of Edward swallowing his words at Christmas - 'God I'm glad I've never had that happen to me. But I can tell you're the one who taught your mom to text...I'm too good to ever make a mistake like that.' - God this was priceless. She most definitely would never let him live this down.

*MB*


End file.
